Awake
by YouFightThoseFairies
Summary: Because Arthur believes Merlin is still unconcious, he tells him how much he really means to him. (I went for short & sweet but somehow I'm unable to not make characters suffer)


„...but you know that don't you?" Merlin drifted back into a strange state of half consciousness. When he heard the familiar voice the thought of opening his eyes crossed his mind but he was unable to move any muscle. His senses weren't working right. The only thing he felt was a comfortable warmth.

"Well, you are clumsy, I'm not taking that back. You wouldn't be you if you didn't scare the prey away, drop the firewood and trip over roots."

It was Arthur's voice.

"But all those other jokes... they're jokes. You know that."

Merlin just listened. It wasn't a conscious decision. The only thing getting though to him was Arthur's voice. Merlin wasn't really able to think about his situation.

"You _are_ an idiot though. You shouldn't have jumped between me and the sorcerer. Where the hell did you get the stupid idea I was worth dying for?"

_You are._

"I'm serious, were would I be without you? I would have killed my father. I would have killed a lot of people wrongfully and therefore started _wars_. I would not have found solutions for a lot of problems. And I would have died a long time ago, way before I became king. I'd be a rubbish king without you. So don't you dare leaving me. Seriously, if you survive and sacrifice yourself like that again, I'll kill you."

Arthur paused.

"Please wake up. I mean it, I need you. I just... I need you at my side. You always know when to distract me with your stupid prattling and when to encourage me, like... saying you believe in me."

Arthur's voice was slightly fading away but Merlin didn't want to let the comforting sound slip away.

"I know, I only said that like... once, but you really are a loyal friend. I can count on all my knights, I know that. But sometimes... sometimes I think you're the only one I can trust. I mean... You... You're the most loyal of them all. Like stupidly loyal. After only days of working for me you already were ready to die, drink poison, for me. Do you remember that? And I really was a prat back then. I think I changed. But maybe not enough. I'll try to be a little less of a prat. I'm just not very good with the whole being nice thing..."

Merlin couldn't fight it any longer. Arthur's voice trailed of.

Merlin must have passed out because now his mind woke up again. And holy spirits, _the pain_. He instantly wished to be unconscious again or at least go back to the numb feeling from before. His whole chest was on fire, every inch of his skin ached and a coldness was spreading deep in his twisted stomach. His magic was fighting it with a forceful energy that his body could barely handle.

He grunted in agony and immediately felt a hand on his forehead. "Shh, I got you. I got you. Fight on for a little longer and then it will stop, I promise. I'm not gonna let you die. I won't lose you."

Merlin didn't have the energy to open his eyes. He felt finger running through his hair, but it couldn't calm him down. He was full on panicking. His feet were cold, his head warm, his stomach freezing and his chest burning hot; it was way too confusing and _unbearable_. He just wanted it to stop. His throat heaved a loud groan. There was a hand on his chest. "Gwaine!" Merlin didn't hear Arthur sounding desperate very often. Footsteps. "Gwaine, do something!"

There was nothing Gwaine could do, Merlin suddenly realised. He was the only one. He had to save himself. The warlock concentrated on the hand on his chest, moving his all the magic seething inside him at that point underneath his skin and formed it into a ball. It was the only thing burning now, with all the unbearable intensity that had been rushing chaotically through his torso. Merlin threw his head back cried out with such power that it caused the energy ball to burst and spread in every direction, reaching every spot, evaporating the coldness. Merlin's head fell to the side and the black unconsciousness greeting him like an old friend.

He had no idea how much time was passing, but he was fading in and out of consciousness for what felt like an eternity. He could move again, so he opened his eyes a couple of times, but he couldn't quite bring up the strength to properly talk to Arthur. Arthur... he was there every time.

Merlin woke up from the sunshine in his face. For the first time, Arthur wasn't sitting next to him. The two knights on each side of him where Gwaine and Percival, who were playfully arguing about something. "Heey, look who's joining the world of the living again", Gwaine said. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm good." Merlin thought about the question for another second and realised that was actually true. No pain at all, he was just felt a little weak. "Yeah, I feel good." Merlin tried to sit up and immediately felt two strong hands helping him.

"We're glad to hear that", Percival said and gently pulled him up. "I'm gonna wake up Arthur, I promised him." He got up and left them.

"It was really close this time, wasn't it? Really, you should have seen the knights, all worried about you", Gwaine said and grinned. "Never seen Arthur like that, actually. Leon and Elyan are probably already on the way back from Camelot. They went to get Gaius."

Gwaine babbled on, but Merlin looked past him. "Merlin, you IDIOT!" Before Merlin could answer, he found himself in a hug that knocked the breath out of him for a second. "Erm, sorry", Arthur said awkwardly and let go. Merlin took a breath and looked at him indignantly. Arthur reached out and grabbed his arm. "Good to have you back, Merlin."


End file.
